Wednesday, September 3, 2014

What do you want the most, more than anything, absolutely yes yes yes?



the most of my wanting is hands covered in mud
muscles sore with joy
strong ties
building together

more than anything
watching the sun dance its way into
an everlasting sky
blinding the stars, the dreams
with the brightness
of day

yes yes yes
a village, a home
a circle, a dome
made of straw and dirt and water
made of eden's delight and wonder
made of love
and tiny matter

the most of my wanting
is a primordial home
bare skin, strong bones
warm bodies pressed into warm bodies

a fire we feed
together

a village that simply uncovers
the old new ways of loving
quiet crackling
exploding wood


+++


i am moving more and more to my own edge of truth, and i'm not quite sure how to be a good teacher with this practice, other than to lead by example.

it has been a long road of unintentionally suppressing my most true expressions. but now, the more i uncover them, the more i realize that they're simply on the edge, and i have been afraid to go there.

i spent a good 70% of burning man with less than 70% of my "private parts" clothed. i went by Eve and it couldn't have felt more apt. i am naked presence. old easy love. wild strength. total embodiment.

i want a home that matches my soul. this dream has been stuck in me for years. i have no money, and that's the truth, so i've been focusing on making money. i've not succeeded at it. not yet.

i've thought that this "making money" thing would be the way to the "making the dream" thing. i'm not sure that's true.

i'm feeling more and more like i just want to be open-hearted with the truth of what i want. out of hiding. surrendered to the not-having. surrendered to support.

i want to choose presence and sharing my truth, over pushing and hustling for something to come.

i want vulnerable sharing to create the tipping point, not muscling and mighting.

so... here's what i really want, some of which i have, and some of which i don't, but all of which i love with every ounce of my honest heart:

i want to do rituals with people every day. light those matches. light their magic. set the world on fire with people alive in their love.

i want to make music and write poetry and get my hands wet and dirty in paint and clay, because that's what makes me feel alive in my love.

i want a partner to build a village with.

i want eye to eye quiet holy connection. tantric magic. ancient whispering gazes.

i want to build these circular straw bail homes by the river and host mini burns and extended ritual gatherings.

i want to explore vastly the worlds of sex and orgasm and unconditional love and holy nudity and pure devotional truth.

i want teachers. to be led down new rabbit holes of pleasure and surrender and health and fire.

i want adventure. spontaneity. to take photographs with real film and play in a dark room, developing.

i want to love myself. so much that i'm not shocked when incredible things come my way. i want love to be the fire i feed over and over and over again, amen, amen, amen.

i want a sanctuary home, with an eternal flame that i feed every day.

i want friendship that surprises and delights.

i want wild joy. co-creation. letting go. burying. wailing wonderful aliveness. orgasms that rattle my core.

i want to teach alongside the best teachers in the world. only after i've been blown to bits and rebuilt by the mystery of wanting more.


+++


and you? what do you want the most, more than anything, absolutely yes yes yes?*

this question brought to you by the brilliant Danielle LaPorte, in her gorgeous Conversation Starters app.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Do you labor and labor and then say 'eh, it's just not right'? :: SWING, DAMNIT DAY 1

Hey magic-makers,

It's Day 1 of Swing, Damn It! and I am really happy-nervous-fuck-yeah-ready to be sharing with you these first three creations.

First up: Introducing a poem in which my soul-mate-5-year-old-bestie reminds us all to make our god damn art, perfectionism be damned!

This was the 5th poem of the year in my poem-a-day project. Over the next 7 days, check back in for a daily video-poem, featuring my fave(ish) poem I wrote per month over the last 7 months.


Poetry-Worthy by Rachael Maddox from Rachael Maddox on Vimeo.


Next up: I made this sparkly promo video for my new coaching program, Magic 17. I really love it, but I've been super shy about sharing it. The matches, though... When I asked them, they were all like, "RACH, PLEASE STOP HIDING YOUR MAGIC." Right. Got it.


Magic 17 ~ Step into the fire from Rachael Maddox on Vimeo.


Lastly: I'm doing an offical PLEASE STOP HIDING YOUR MAGIC invitation. Because solidarity is one of my favorite medicines on earth. Over the next 7 days (7/21-7/27), I'm offering 17% off to anyone who signs up for Magic 17. You can buy it now, and use it later, too, if you want to get in on the sale but this isn't your moment for the intensive.

Below's a summary of the program, and right here's a more in-depth read on things. To apply your 17% discount, write to me on the Magic 17 with I'M DONE HIDING MY MAGIC and that'll be the secret-code for your 17% off discount.

+++
Magic 17 is a coaching program for people who are ready to make immediate and deeply aligned change in one or two specific areas of their lives, using a fiery, fun and powerful modality.

We combine a sacred ritual with traditional coaching techniques, for a potent experience that initiates change, growth, and real-world results, in alchemical timing.

The ritual? Lite a match. Answer a question in the time it takes for the match to burn. Repeat. We do this for 17 minutes, 7 different times over a 17 day time-frame.

The continuity of having a session every 2 to 3 days, plus the alchemy of the fire, makes this program especially powerful for people who are ready, now, to co-create deep shifts and real-world results in their lives.
+++


To magic, and imperfection, and of course, sharing. Thanks for receiving my gifts! No it's your turn: Swing, Damnit!

Lots of love,
Rachael

Monday, July 14, 2014

Crisis Control vs Crisis Alchemy, and an Invitation to Show Up and Swing


My friends and I have this casual habit of referring to our life-stages as a "crisis of [fill-in-the-blank]". (I know, I know, negative thinking blah blah blah... It's the fun unenlightened reality, folks). For a while I was in a crisis of faith. Before that, a crisis of sex. Now, I've been moving through a crisis of confidence, and it's exactly why I'm showing up, writing you.

I'm remembering that crises aren't actually crises until we try to control them.

Control, as it relates to crisis, often focuses on locking things down to a stable place. This is good sometimes--good for catching your breath, getting your bearings. But after that, something more magical is desirable, because no one really wants to always live in the land of merely-catching-breath.

Introducing Crisis Alchemy: the process of leaning into the friction and discomfort of transformation, and emerging more intelligent and whole.

Back to my confidence crisis for just a moment, then I'm going to tell you exactly how to best apply crisis alchemy.

At this point, I can easily assert that the past seven months have been the most creatively productive of my entire life. And yet, sharing has felt like a surefire trip to the dungeon of doom, ridden with endless opportunity for rejection, disapproval and losing--or worse, being totally overlooked. I write excuse after excuse about why I can't share, and instead, hide out with my creations, offering glances only to the people I know will love me, no matter. Confidence crisis, summed up.

The opportunity for crisis alchemy deliverance? Ask inverse questions.

In my case, the old way, the stuck way, would ask over and over and OVER again, What's the risk of sharing? How might this go wrong? What do I have to lose if I share?

But the new way, the alchemical way, asks the inverse questions:

+What's the risk of not sharing? 
+What's in grave danger of not happening if I stay hidden and covert? 
+What's the cost of avoiding friction?

You can do the same question-inversion process with whatever crisis you might be amidst. Sex, cash, housing, identity. Flip your normal questions on their back. Walk curiously through the opening. (Hint: our normal questions are usually fear based when we're in crisis mode. That's the reason why we feel like it's a crisis: 'cause terror's taken over creativity).

Some love-based alchemical questions:

+What's the risk of NOT being honest?
+What's the cost of NOT sharing my heart?
+What definitely WON'T happen if I never go for it?
+What happens if I NEVER apologize? 
+What happens if I KEEP apologizing?
+Who wins if I walk away? Who wins if I stay?
+What if anger's good?
+What will definitely happen if I act based on fear?
+What would total faith do, right now?
+What's the price of stalling?
+What's the wisdom of patience?
+Who might I connect with, inspire or impact positively if I step out on a ledge, now?
+What do others not understand, that I know as deep and true wisdom?
+What am I gaining, even if they disagree with me?
+What could budging on my stubbornness do for the good of all?
+What if they want to love me? Can I give them the chance?

When I answer questions like these--alchemical and love-based--my true desires are highlighted, rather than the darkness of my fear.


And what I'm constantly having to remind myself about alchemy is this: alchemy happens when you keep your eye on the ball of your desire, instead of focusing on the dark of your fear, or the discomfort of learning how to nail your desire. 

Desire inspires practice if you're tapping into it. So ask the alchemical questions, then simply show up to the batting cage. Swing and miss. Swing and hit. Just swing.

The alchemy's in the woosh of trying, once you know what you really wanna try for.

+++

In the spirit of the woosh of trying, and because what I really desire is to SHARE the magic stuff I've created, I've made a handy seven-day digital event called Swing, Damn It. It starts next Monday the 21st, and runs through to Sunday the 27th. Once a day, for seven days, we share our creations, our offerings, our expression.

Head here for the details. It'll be a supportive, fun way to 1) share our magic, 2) meet other awesome creative people and learn about what they're up to, 3) generate togetherness as opposed to competition, and 4) be seen and heard.

Oh, and it's totally free.

Wild love, wild hearts. We got this.
xo,
Rachael

Saturday, July 5, 2014

Declaration of Interdependence : Ground Zero of the Togetherness Revolution



This is a declaration of humble grand simple humanness, in which it is hereby stated that we know this as truth: the real magic, the greatest magic of all, is giving everything to each other. Not hoarding for ourselves in our bomb shelters of fear, but offering our gifts, mixing and melting into collaborations born from true inspiration and insight that we are able to do something beautiful, something noble, something for others that brings them joy or peace, something for ourselves that feeds our power to give more, to celebrate more, to praise more the wildness of life. Because giving, celebrating, praising--they're the gold we never knew we always had. The magic that requires no spells, just letting go and calling out, "How can I help?" "Hallelujah!" Hooooo, baby, lookin' good!"

A movement has taken hold. A movement of people building a truly sustainable container for human thriving, based on four key pillars: personal practices, loving friendship, sustainable environments, and the best use of the Internet. The combination of these ingredients is creating a togetherness like never before; one that is changing the landscape of humanity as we know it, making way for a love-based aliveness of a whole new caliber.


1. PERSONAL PRACTICES. Our movement is rooted in personal practices that foster:
  • physical health, vitality and sensuality
  • emotional resilience, appreciation and expression
  • mental clarity, ease and creativity
  • spiritual wisdom and remembrance

2. LOVING FRIENDSHIP. Our movement is rooted in friendship that loves in the languages of:
  • sharing our gifts and resources
  • honoring ourselves and each other for our natural gifts, as well as struggles
  • shamelessness & honesty
  • devotion to staying through the thick of mortality, with laughter, dancing & helping hands

3. NURTURING ENVIRONMENTS. Our movement is rooted in nurturing home and work environments that facilitate:
  • the health of the body
  • accessibility to friendship as well as solitude
  • connection with (and fostering of) the magic of the earth

4. INTERWEBS. Our movement is supported by the best use of the Internet as:
  • a tool for rapid connection and cross pollination of these ideas
  • a means for facilitating a whole new way

A way of never-before-so-possible, but now almost inevitable. A way in which love, compassion and the integrity of humanitarianism ensures that our whole human family is fed and housed, healing violence, and creating abundant opportunities for connection, joy and peace. A way in which this insurance of togetherness, this deep sense of the human family, is the new norm we never knew was actually possible until it rose up in us like our first human-family orgasm.

In this Declaration of Interdependence, let it be known that I was half asleep while writing, therefore it was more like plucking words, one by one, like stars from the sky of our collective dreamland. Perhaps interdependence is a dream. Perhaps togetherness is our deepest dream, underneath all the climbing for personal acclaim. Perhaps we simply want to make it, and we secretly wish that we didn't have to be alone at the top of the mountain (or the bottom, for that matter).

This Declaration is an invitation. You can have this dream if you want it: the dream for our togetherness. You can walk toward it, run toward it, dance in it, awaken it like a sleeping dragon. You can INSIST that we are smart enough, caring enough, and committed enough, to create awesome new ways of honor and sustainability that support the masses of humanity... and we can do so by: 1) helping each other unlock our passions and come into our magic, and 2) reminding ourselves and each other that our magic is here to service the whole of humanity, the whole of existence. 

This fire, this persistence, when infused with the real practice of wild love, will burn down the way it was. We will rise, together, and wipe the ash off each other's backs. We can have togetherness. We can belong--to the earth, to each other, to our bodies, inside the great gorgeous mystery of life. We already do. May we remain in awareness, in remembrance of our intelligent capacity, our courageous willingness, our supportive tools, and our loving manifestation of our highest destiny as humans: peaceful, thriving, glorious and gorgeous interdependence.

I love you. I love you so much. Let's be together.
Love,
Rachael

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Surprise Me



today will go down in the history books
as the umteenth time
i let the five year old girl i nanny
fuel my sleepless body
with the silly folly of dancing to billy joel

it will go down on record
as the hundredth time
i'm hung over on heartbreak--
i've gotten smarter, by now,
at drinking lots of water
while cracking, crying
calling on each others courage

today will go down as the third time, maybe fourth
that i looked myself in the mirror--
after sleeping in my clothes from the night before--
and said, "grow up, kid.
it won't kill your spirit."

today, was the fifth time i burned all my little dreams.
floated ashes down the stream
whispered silently to the hot summer sky,
"surprise me.
surprise me."